Tuesday 1 May 2012

Tightrope


Image by Silvia Sani

I have always been a deep thinker. It is my both my downfall and my strong point. In earlier days I would overthink simple scenarios and create havoc in my head. As I have grown older (and wiser) I have learned to let go of the insignificant drama, so now my deep thinking trait works in my favour. I am one of those people that needs to dissect situations in my head to fully understand them with logic and less emotion. They start off emotionally charged then over the dissection process I wind up seeing situations with logic and sensible awareness. I hate the emotional level at the onset but I always love the outcome. Clear head.

I have never been one to wallow. If something isn’t working, I change it. I have some huge changes ahead of me, I know they’re coming as I am the one putting them in place. I am afraid, I am excited, I am cautious but eager. They are changes that will take me totally out of my comfort zone, and every so often when I stop to consider it I feel my stomach flip. The fear is what drives me, the not knowing and the idea that I will be balancing the tightrope we call life without a harness or a net to catch me. It’s okay, I want to take that risk. I am ready. And I know these choices will not suit others, but that’s okay too, they are not anyone else’s choices to make. This is after all my life.

I have always considered myself a doer. I procrastinate and I dissect a lot in my head, all the time. I think way too much, I have to admit. But one thing I don’t do is plod. If shit isn’t happening, I change it. It is as complex and as simple as that. Too often I hear people whining about their situations, yet see them take no action. That pisses me off. Don’t like your life, do something about it. I know my choices won’t please everyone, heck they might not please a single soul, but I can live with that. As long as my child is warm at night and loved like no other I am happy. I will forfeit riches and comfort in the form of the old treadmill we climb upon each morning when we head out to fulfill our duties every day for true, dead set happiness. In a heartbeat. The day I stop following my heart and setting out to wake up with true passion in my soul will be the day I die inside. I don’t want to die inside. I am a doer. I have too much passion and drive to die inside.

All that from thinking.

16 comments:

  1. I like the wAy you think Peggy...

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    1. Thank you Reannon, there's a lot of that going on!

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  2. Love your thoughts and your attitude Peggy!

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  3. I think you've hit the nail on the head Peggy, it IS YOUR life, no one elses. So often we live our lives to please others or at times to prevent from rocking the proverbial boat. But there comes a point when you just have to be true to yourself and seek your own destiny. Stay strong my friend, good things are bound to come your way xo

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    1. I've never been one to worry too much about what others think and I have never cared about pleasing others with my choices, but every so often I have to remind myself to make choices based on what makes me happy. rather than what is 'right'. Right for who anyway!?

      Thanks Jules, you always remind me which way to go with your kind words of encouragement. xo

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  4. I love your way and admire your courage.
    Good on you, Peggy.
    :-) xx

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    1. Time to be brave Shar, thank you sweets. xo

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  5. I wish you all the happiness in the world. And as a mother, you know that I don't always agree with the choices you might make but never the less I want you to be happy. Love you forever xxoo

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    1. Thanks Mum. We can't please everyone hey, and we won't always be pleased by the choices of others. That's life I guess. xo

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  6. Being a deep thinker AND a doer is a fantastic combination, Peggy. I wish you all the luck and support in the world as you bravely go forth. x

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    1. Thanks Bron, it does have its upsides! Thank you for the kind words of encouragement. xo

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  7. I completely relate to making changes even when your afraid and even when other people think your wrong. But I think that life is so precious and it's always most important to follow our passions.

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    1. Agree, agree, agree! A wise young lass once told me 'live and let live'. I choose living!

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  8. Great thinking Pegs!!! You're the Michaelangelo of your own life ;)

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    1. Thanks lovely, grabbing my paint brush with gusto! :)

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